Blended with Pain: Notorious Devils (Cash Bar Book 4) Read online

  I wipe my hands on the front of my jeans before I reach for the handle of the bar. I’m wearing a pair of skin-tight jeans, flat shoes, and the crop top I came to town in. Ginger told me to dress sexy, and I don’t really have cleavage to show off, but I figured tight pants and a short top would get the job done.

  As soon as I walk into the bar I’m greeted by Traci. She gives me a wave and a wide smile. I’m working a mid-day shift today to get my feet wet. Two to nine. Ginger claims the place is busy around dinner time, but then it tapers down until ten, then it ramps back up.

  “You can take the back half of the floor,” Traci says as she walks toward me. “The cook is in the back, menu is simple and there’s one on every table. We don’t really do fancy like I said. You’ll catch on easy,” she rambles. “Oh, apron’s beneath the bar,” she grins, then turns and hurries away.

  Walking behind the bar, I crouch down and look around for an apron. I find the black fabric and wrap it around my waist, tying it in a knot. There is a pad of paper and a pen already inside the pocket. The back half of the bar is empty and I’m glad for it. I need a moment to just breathe.

  “You okay, babe?” a male voice asks from behind me.

  I jump, turning around to see a man leaning against the sink. He’s tall, almost as tall as Ace. His hair is much darker though, and his face is covered with a few days’ worth of stubble. He’s handsome and I notice that he’s not wearing a Notorious Devils vest.

  “Where’s your vest?” I blurt out.

  His eyes widen, then his lips twitch into a smile. “Don’t have a cut, because that shit ain’t for me. Cool guys, but not my deal,” he shrugs. “I’m Ned. I run the bar during the day,” he explains.

  “Cut?”

  “Vest,” he clarifies. “It’s what they call them.”

  I feel my face heating. “Oh,” I whisper.

  “You claimed?” he asks, his eyes roaming over my face, neck, and stomach.

  Frowning, I shrug. “I don’t think so.”

  His dark eyes sparkle and his smile grows. “Babe, seen a lot in this bar. One thing I know for certain is that if you were claimed, you know it down to your bones, to your fucking marrow and soul,” he says.

  My heart drops into my stomach. I would know. Wouldn’t I? Ace doesn’t seem like someone who can’t make a decision. He knew he wanted me to come here with Axe, he knew he wanted to fuck me, and he knew when he was here he could dump me off at that trailer and I would take care of Axe without questioning him.

  “Looks like you have some tables to tend. You need me at all, you holler. I’m a bartender, but I’m also the only bouncer around here,” he winks.

  I nod, turning away from him. I swear I hear him grunt as I walk away, but I don’t even react. I don’t know if he meant me to hear it or not. Plus, I’m too embarrassed to say anything, anyway.

  There are three men sitting around a table, and they’re all wearing vests, or cuts, as Ned educated. “Can I help y’all?” I ask trying to keep my voice as even as possible.

  “Hey, Carson,” a voice says, and I look over to see Snake sitting at the table. I was so nervous I didn’t recognize him and my face heats with embarrassment.

  “Hello,” I smile as I give him a lame wave. He’s my boss, Ace’s president, and I didn’t even recognize him.

  “Four beers,” he chuckles.

  I nod, then decide to ask if they need any food. “No thanks, darlin’,” another man says. I turn to him and he grins. “Motorhead, babe.”

  “Hey, I’m Carson,” I say as my way of introducing myself.

  I have a feeling they all know my name, and my entire story. I hate that. And yet, I don’t mind it so much, at the same time. It makes things less awkward for them, even if it is more awkward for me. Plus, I don’t have to explain anything. Turning away from them, I hurry over to Ned and put in the order for four beers.

  “They didn’t say what kind,” I say in a panic. “Oh, I just fucked up,” I mutter.

  Ned reaches across the bar and wraps his hand around my wrist giving me a gentle squeeze. His palm is warm, and I’m surprised by how it feels against my skin. I usually shrink away from men’s touch. Well, except for Ace’s of course. I’ve been so busy making myself unavailable that I haven’t had many men even attempt to touch me.

  I glance down at his hand, then back up to his dark eyes. “There’s only one kind of beer, a new beer is on rotation every couple of weeks. However, Ginger always puts a Notorious Devils favorite under the bar for the guys.” I watch as he reaches down and grabs four bottles, releasing my hand to pop their tops, then places them on a tray.

  “You didn’t fuck anything up, this place is easy as shit, babe,” he winks and I wrap my fingers around the tray, lifting it as I take a step back.

  “Thanks Ned,” I whisper.

  I deliver the beers to the men, and take a step back but one of them lifts his hand to stop me. Motorhead, is what he introduced himself as. I look down at him and wait for him to speak, since it looks like he has something to say.

  “My woman had a man touch her like that, I’d kill him then spank her ass until she was red as fuck and couldn’t sit for a week,” he announces. “Watch that, honey.”

  The other men are making choking noises, all but Snake. I glance at all of them but when I make eye contact with Snake he only dips his chin. I don’t know what he’s trying to communicate, but it’s something.

  “I uh, I don’t feel comfortable discussing Ace with you. But I’m not his woman,” I whisper.

  Motorhead barks out a laugh. “On what fuckin’ planet?” he asks. I wonder how they’re all experts on my love life, and how they’d decided to just butt into it at the same time. What the hell?

  “I haven’t even talked to him, let alone seen him since he told me to leave the clubhouse the day I arrived. So…” I shrug, my eyes focusing on Motorhead. “I’m certain that I’m not his woman, I’m pretty sure I’m nothing but his son’s babysitter, which is fine by me.” I lie.

  It isn’t fine by me, not by a longshot. I loved his touch, the way he made me feel when he was inside of me and the way he whispered Sweet Pea. Turning away from them, I rush toward the bar as quickly as my feet will carry me.

  “Go take a break,” Traci announces as soon as I arrive.

  Shaking my head and sucking in a deep breath. “I just got here, no way,” I state.

  “They can be assholes. I shouldn’t have let you wait on them,” she says, lifting her hand to her forehead.

  I shrug. “They were just looking out for their friend. I don’t blame them. I’m okay though,” I say giving her a fake smile.

  “Fake it ‘til you make it, Sugar Pop,” she winks.

  I lift my chin as I inhale a deep breath. Then, I head toward another table of people who have sat down in my section. Fake it ‘til I make it. It’s great fucking advice and I’m going to use it. Faking it is probably the only way I’m going to survive it—life that is, my life.

  KEYS

  “FUCK,” Snake hisses after I’ve told him everything that I could find. I’m sure there’s a shit ton more, but it will just take more time for me to dig it up. “There’s no way to know who is part of them, who will retaliate once Skull decides it’s time,” he mutters.

  I grunt. Snakes eyes lift to me and he lifts a brow. “Kill them all. Big Sky, and the compounds in Montana and Wyoming. Pretty sure that shit will reveal who is legit and who is a poser.”

  Snake shakes his head. “Ordering hits on brothers, especially when you don’t know who’s guilty and who is innocent. That’s sketchy.”

  Placing my palms on the edge of his desk, I lean over just inches from his face. “They’re all guilty, Snake. Every single one of them knows what the fuck is going on. They’re guilty as sin, they haven’t stopped it or informed anyone else about what’s going on because they’re too busy fucking kidnapped women.”

  Standing, I place my fists on my hips and look down at him.

  �
�I’ll call MadDog,” he mutters.

  Shaking my head, I snort. “You do that,” I spit.

  “My hands are tied, Keys. They’re fucking tied. You don’t get it, you’re not in the position that I am. Go home, get some sleep, take care of your woman and your kid,” he mutters.

  My eyes meet his and I tilt my head to the side. “What the fuck’s that supposed to mean?” I bark.

  “You’ve been home a week. You’ve barely ate, you haven’t slept, and you haven’t seen them. You know what I mean.”

  I suppress the growl that threatens to escape. Clenching my fists so that I don’t punch my new president in the side of the head. “My woman, my kid, ain’t your business,” I grind out.

  He smirks but doesn’t say anything. Wisely. I’m pissed because he’s right. I’m a stubborn fuck too, because now I’ll make a point not to go over there until I’m good and ready. When the truth is, I want to sink inside of Carson’s warm body so goddamn bad that I can practically taste her wet pussy on my tongue.

  I don’t go up to my room, instead, I make my way over to the bar and sit on a stool. The prospect behind the bar slides an opened beer toward me. I dip my chin in a silent thanks and take a long pull from the bottle. Fuck it tastes good. Too good.

  “Hey,” a sweet voice says next to me.

  Glancing over, I tip my head down and look at the cleavage of the little whore at my side. “Hey,” I grunt. She’s new, really fucking new. I’ve never seen her before. My teeth sink into my bottom lip as I look at her ample chest, her tits are fighting beneath her skin-tight shirt, practically begging for release.

  Releasing the grip on my beer, I use my fingers to slip down the center of her tits. I listen, smirking when her breath hitches at the move. She’s really fucking new if that affects her. I wonder what other little sounds of surprise she would make?

  I hear someone snort next to me, and I glance over to see Baby standing at my side. “Oh don’t let me interrupt you,” he mutters, lifting his beer to his lips.

  “What the fuck?” I ask.

  He shakes his head. “Never thought you’d ditch that sweet thing you had goin’ with Carson. Not for a whore,” he shrugs. “That’s all.”

  “Ain’t ditching anyone. Not that it’s yours or Snake’s, or anyone else’s fuckin’ business. Carson is where she needs to be. At home, taking care of our boy. I’ll go home to her when I feel like it.”

  Baby pushes off the bar, his eyes finding mine and his lips twitch. “You’re a fucking fool, brother. Have your fun. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s not around by the time you make your way back to her.”

  I flip him off, turning my attention back to the little girl at my side. “Let’s go,” I mutter, finishing my beer as I slide off of the stool.

  “You have an Old Lady?” she asks timidly, her voice trembling.

  My brows snap together. “Not yet, but yeah pretty much. Not your business though. Not really,” I inform her.

  “I don’t want to cause any problems...” Her words trail off and I stop walking toward my room, turning to face her, I glare down into her big round, scared, eyes.

  Dipping my head a little closer to her, I speak in a low, but firm voice. “Bitch, it’s not your business. Your job is to spread or open, nothing else.”

  She nods, but the moment is over. Fuck. Releasing her hand, I stomp away. She calls out for me, but I ignore her and head outside.

  “Fuck,” I shout as soon as the door slams behind me.

  “Go to her,” a voice says. Turning my head, I notice Crooner is leaning against the side of the building. “You did what you needed to do, you got the information Snake needed. Now, go to her.”

  I shake my head. My mouth opening and closing a few times but nothing comes out. “Trust me,” he says, pushing off of the wall. “Fucking trust me when I tell you. Go to her.”

  He leaves me alone, walking over to his bike and I watch him straddle it. His bike roars to life and then he lifts his hand in a two-fingered wave and he’s gone. Probably on his way home to his pregnant woman and his kid.

  Closing my eyes, I lean my head against the wall. I should go home to her. Why won’t my feet take me to my bike so that I can go? Why did I almost fuck a whore when I know she’d welcome me with open arms? Why haven’t I seen my own kid in a week?

  Fucking why?

  I wish I had the answer. I wish I knew what the fuck I was doing. I don’t. I don’t have the first fucking clue.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  CARSON

  “DON’T GO ANYWHERE,” Ned’s voice calls out at the end of my shift.

  Today is my second day, and it was better than the first but still tough. I think by the end of the week I should have the hang of everything though. Rolling my shoulder, I slip my purse over it and look over at Ned. He gives me a wink, and I watch as he serves the man in front of him his cold brew. He shakes his hand, then jogs over to me.

  Tipping my head back, I look into his dark eyes. “Thought I’d walk you home,” he shrugs.

  I don’t point out that I only live across the parking lot, or that Roxanne is home and waiting for me with Axe. Pressing my lips together, I give him a nod.

  “Okay,” I whisper.

  His lips turn up into a lopsided grin and he wraps his warm hand around my elbow before he guides me toward the back of the bar. Traci catches my eye before I’m out of sight and lifts her brows. I give her a shrug which causes her lips to twitch as she shakes her head.

  Maybe she thinks I’m crazy. Maybe I am crazy. I don’t feel crazy though. Ned seems like a nice enough guy, and he’s my co-worker. It’s sweet that he wants to make sure I’m okay. I should probably tell him that I am claimed, or at least I think I am, but he wasn’t wrong. I should know if Ace wants me. I should know if I’m in a relationship with him. I shouldn’t be unsure, not of something that important.

  “Tell me about you, sweetheart,” Ned prompts gently as we walk slowly toward the trailer.

  I bite the corner of my lip, thinking about how I’m going to answer that question when he stops dead in his tracks. He tugs my elbow back and I look up to him with confusion. He’s staring at something, I slowly turn my head to see where he’s looking and my breath hitches.

  Ace is there.

  He’s standing at the trailer, his gaze pointed directly at us while Axe uses his car as a pretend airplane and runs around the small grass patch of a yard.

  “Thinking maybe you forgot to mention something to me, Carson?”

  I shift my gaze from Ace, up to Ned. “I told you I didn’t know if I was claimed,” I admit.

  He shakes his head. “You had his baby, you’re claimed, sweetheart.”

  “He’s my nephew, but I’ve raised him,” I inform him.

  Ned’s eyes soften, and he lifts his hand. I think he’s going to wrap his fingers around the side of my neck like Ace does, but he doesn’t. His index finger touches my nose and he releases his hold on my elbow as he takes a step away.

  “You get that situation figured out, then you come see me? I’d love to get to know you better,” he says.

  “Okay,” I nod. My cheeks feel warm, and they turn to flaming hot when a shadow falls over us.

  “Ned,” Ace growls.

  Ned clears his throat. “Just making sure Carson made it home okay,” Ned halfway lies.

  Ace grunts, crossing his arms over his chest. I focus on the way his biceps bulge, the way his t-shirt hugs them perfectly. Then my eyes move over to his cut, allowing myself to really see it for the first time.

  I eye his name, the one he told me they called him by, Keys, sewn onto a patch. His cut is weathered, beat-up, his patches stained and dirty. He’s been doing this a while.

  Houston’s is brand new looking, and Roxanne explained that it was because he’s only a prospect and not a full-fledged member yet. Ace is an old hat, this is truly his life.

  “Think she can walk across the parking lot, Ned. What’s your deal, you want in my woman’s
pants?” Ace asks.

  My eyes quickly lift to his, no longer avoiding his gaze. He’s smirking, and it pisses me off. I don’t let Ned respond. I close the distance between us and crane my neck back. “It’s none of your business what Ned wants with me, or what I want with him. Not your business,” I hiss.

  Ace reaches out his hand wrapping around my bicep and he tugs me against his chest, my body slams against him hard as I’m knocked off balance by his rough tug.

  “Oh, that’s where you’re wrong, Sweet Pea. Everything you do is my business, especially when some other fuck is trying to get a piece of what’s mine.”

  I lift my hand and start to slap him across the face, but his fingers grab ahold of my wrist and firmly grip me, stopping me from striking him. “Told you not to even attempt it again, Carson.” He growls.

  “You’re an asshole,” I hiss in his face.

  He lowers his head, his lips brushing mine gently before he speaks against my mouth. “Yeah, Sweet Pea, I fuckin’ know I am. You’ll get used to it, you may even like it. What you won’t do is let another man touch you, anywhere, ever.”

  I don’t look to see if Ned is still standing next to me, I assume he isn’t. I try to wriggle from Ace’s grasp, but he won’t let me go. He pulls me even harder against him, tucking the hand he has in his grasp between us. Lowering his head, his tongue licks the seam of my lips and he grunts.

  “Missed your sweet taste,” he mutters.

  I try to push against him to free myself, again. “Where have you been?” I ask.

  He smiles, his lips moving against my cheek, to my jaw and then over to my ear. “Did you miss me, Sweet Pea?” he rasps.

  I snort. “I didn’t,” I lie as goosebumps break out over my skin. “You abandoned us.”

  He releases me a little, taking one step back, but no more, and he keeps my wrist in his grasp. “I didn’t abandon you. I was working, I told you that.”

  I roll my eyes, then my gaze connects to his again. “For over a week? Alone?” I ask, arching a brow.

  He smirks, shaking his head like there’s something funny about my question. “Just stop stringing me along,” I rasp, trying to keep my tears at bay. I want to yell at myself for even producing the stupid tears, but I’m at the end of my rope with him.