Sweeten My Life (Nasty Bastards MC Book 7) Read online

  SWEETEN MY LIFE

  A NASTY BASTARDS MC NOVEL

  HAYLEY FAIMAN

  HAYLEY FAIMAN BOOKS LLC

  CONTENTS

  Also by Hayley Faiman

  Stay Connected

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  Also by Hayley Faiman

  Sweeten My Life

  Copyright © 2022 by Hayley Faiman

  All rights reserved.

  Cover Designer: Pink Ink Designs. Cassy Roop.

  Editor: My Brother’s Editor. Ellie McLove.

  Proofreading: My Brothers Editor. Rosa Sharon.

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Visit my website at: http://hayleyfaiman.com

  Created with Vellum

  ALSO BY HAYLEY FAIMAN

  Men of Baseball Series—

  Pitching for Amalie

  Catching Maggie

  Forced Play for Libby

  Sweet Spot for Victoria

  Russian Bratva Series —

  Owned by the Badman

  Seducing the Badman

  Dancing for the Badman

  Living for the Badman

  Tempting the Badman

  Protected by the Badman

  Forever my Badman

  Betrothed to the Badman

  Chosen by the Badman

  Bought by the Badman

  Collared by the Badman

  Notorious Devils MC —

  Rough & Rowdy

  Rough & Raw

  Rough & Rugged

  Rough & Ruthless

  Rough & Ready

  Rough & Rich

  Rough & Real

  Cash Bar Series —

  Laced with Fear

  Chased with Strength

  Flamed with Courage

  Blended with Pain

  Twisted with Chaos

  Mixed with trouble

  SAVAGE BEAST MC —

  UnScrew Me

  UnBreak Me

  UnChain Me

  UnLeash Me

  UnTouch Me

  UnHinge Me

  UnWreck Me

  UnCage Me

  Unfit Hero Series —

  CONVICT

  HERO

  FRAUD

  KILLER

  COWBOY

  Zanetti Famiglia Series —

  Becoming the Boss

  Becoming his Mistress

  Becoming his Possession

  Becoming the Street Boss

  Becoming the Hitman

  Becoming his Wife

  Becoming her Salvation

  Prophecy Sisters Series —

  Bride of the Traitor

  Bride of the Sea

  Bride of the Frontier

  Bride of the Emperor

  Astor Family Series —

  Hypocritically Yours

  Egotistically Yours

  Matrimonially Yours

  Occasionally Yours

  Nasty Bastards MC —

  Ruin My Life

  Tame My Life

  Start My Life

  Dance into My Life

  Shake Up My Life

  Repair My Life

  Sweeten My Life

  Underworld Sinners—

  Stolen by the Sinner

  Bound to the Sinner

  Caught by the Sinner

  F*cked by the Sinner

  Stripped by the Sinner

  Rejecting the Sinner

  Loved by the Sinner

  Offspring Legends—

  Between Flaming Stars

  Beautiful Unwanted Wildflower

  Esquire Black Duet Series –

  DISCOVERY

  APPEAL

  Forbidden Love Series —

  Personal Foul

  Kinetic Energy

  Standalone Titles

  Royally Relinquished: A Modern Day Fairy Tale

  STAY CONNECTED

  Website: http://hayleyfaiman.com

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  Patience is bitter, but it’s fruit is sweet,

  JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU

  CHAPTER ONE

  PAIGE

  “Admit it,” Country growls.

  Biting the inside of my cheek, I look to the floor, then bring my attention back to him. Zeph tilts his chin down, his eyes focused on mine, but he’s angry as shit. He’s always pissed off at me.

  Maybe that’s just who we are at this point. He’s always angry, always yelling. Always trying to control me. Always thinks that he has some kind of claim on me. If I give him what he wants, will he magically be different? Will I? I’m not sure, but at the same time, I don’t think that I want to know.

  Because no matter what kind of claim he thinks he has on me.

  He doesn’t.

  Nobody does.

  Not anymore.

  At least, that’s what I tell myself over and over. Because if I admit it then it’s all real. If I say it out loud… well, I just don’t want to. I’m not ready for anything more than what we have. I don’t know if I ever will be either.

  “I’m not going to admit anything. There is nothing to declare. Nothing to say,” I snap.

  He growls again, taking a step toward me, his eyes never leaving my own. Then he leans down slightly. “You wanna sleep in my bed. You only sleep in my bed. Nowhere fucking else, which means you’re mine. So just goddamn admit what you are.”

  “I refuse,” I hiss.

  “Fuck. Fucking hell,” he barks. “You are a pain in the goddamn ass.”

  I open my mouth to defend myself, but he’s probably not wrong. Snapping my mouth closed, I don’t say anything. I watch as he lifts his hands, throwing them in the air, as if he’s done with me, finally finished. I decide to end this now before we both say something that we’ll equally regret.

  Turning from him, I head over to Ironfist and Rebecca who are all curled around one another looking far too cute. I love, love. Seeing them together makes me smile, but I’m just not sure I want
that kind of thing for myself, not after everything.

  “I’m headed out now. I’ll stay the night. I don’t want to come back here,” I admit.

  Their eyes widen, they each nod, and no other words are spoken. Making my way outside, I swiftly walk over to the little car that the MC lets me borrow. It’s nothing fancy, it’s a used Dodge Avenger. It’s more than I’ve ever had in my entire life though, and it’s not even really mine. But it feels like it is, and I suppose that is all that matters.

  Sinking into the front seat, I start the engine, then shift the car out of the parking lot and down the driveway to the exit gate. It opens slowly, looking in my rearview mirror, I assume that Zeph is standing somewhere behind me, watching me, but he isn’t.

  Pinching my eyes closed, I grip the steering wheel tightly and let out an exhale before opening my eyes and taking my foot off of the brake. I head toward the school to pick up all four of Rebecca’s kids.

  I love what I do. Babysitting them, being around them, it makes me forget. It helps me to ignore everything that has happened to me, and they keep me so busy that I can’t focus on anything in particular. I can push it all to the back of my mind as if it never existed. I’m able to forget about my past and even my present.

  I should be grateful that Zeph wants me. It’s probably the best offer that I’ll ever have in my entire life. He isn’t just some member of the Nasty Bastards MC, he’s the secretary of the club. He’s well respected, and he used to be a cop.

  Zeph is everything a girl like me could ever hope to have, and I know without a doubt that I do not deserve a man like him. I am tainted, not just my body, but also my mind. I’m so fucked up from my childhood, from my upbringing, I would do nothing but drag him down and he doesn’t deserve that.

  But he wants me anyway. No matter how much I push him away. He still wants me.

  So, we fight.

  I pull away, he pushes forward. We fight and fuck and fight, and fuck, over and over. I don’t know that it will ever stop. I’m just desperate and pathetic enough that I would never turn him down or tell him no, at least not physically. And he is too full of pride to beg or even discuss anything.

  He demands I’m his woman. I deny that I am, even though I probably am. He’s right. I only want him, I’m only with him—there is only him.

  So that’s where we stand.

  He demands that I admit to him what I want, that it’s him. He’s right, I do want him, I do wish that I could tell him that I do. But I can’t. I can’t because he deserves someone not as broken on the inside as I am.

  So, I refuse, and we fight, and it just is a big circle that never ends. I’m not stupid though, I know that one day it will end. He’ll get tired of the arguing. Someone who is much less work than I am will come along and she’s going to fit in perfectly with everyone, unlike me.

  I’m definitely on the outside looking in when it comes to club life, and I’m okay with that. I was on the inside for far too long. I’m okay with being on the fringe in this or any other club. Although this one is nothing like the club that I grew up in, it doesn’t matter. I don’t really feel the need to be intermingled in any of it more than I already am.

  Also, I feel like my only true friend is Rebecca, and of course, her awesome kids. Driving toward the after-school program to pick them up, I wonder if this is enough. Is this all that I need? I’m almost nineteen years old and I should have a lot more hopes and dreams than I do.

  Shouldn’t I be aspiring toward something instead of just hanging out on the sidelines and watching the world move around me? But at the same time, my only hope my entire life was to survive the next day.

  This life that I have now, I don’t know exactly how to cope with it. I have never had an opportunity to breathe easy. To sleep safely and I do now. It’s the biggest and best gift I could have ever been given and the last thing that I want to do is waste it.

  COUNTRY

  Paige pisses me right the fuck off.

  And at the same time, the only thing that I want to do with her is fuck her brains out.

  She’s beautiful, feisty when she’s not in public, and she’s fucking funny as shit too. She’s also sweet as goddamn sugar. She’s everything I ever wanted in a woman, even if she’s a bit too young for me. But that shit doesn’t matter, not anymore. I know her and her heart and she’s what I want for my future.

  The bitch goddamn refuses to just let it happen though. I know she wants me. I see it in her eyes. I see the way she looks at me when I’m inside of her. I feel her body move toward me in her sleep. She’s mine. She just won’t fucking admit it. Not to me and not to her goddamn self either.

  That’s the worst part of this entire situation. She won’t even entertain the fact that she wants me, wants us. She’s just walking around during the day, denying everything about me while fucking me in the dark.

  Fuck.

  “Brother, you need a beer and some pussy.” Bans chuckles next to me.

  “Pussy is what got me needing the fucking beer,” I grunt as I lift a hand and wave over the prospect for a beer.

  The drink is slid across the bar to me and I gladly accept it. Lifting it to my lips I take a long pull. There is a moment of silence while I let the liquid move down my throat, then I let out a sigh and turn to Bans.

  Bans and I have been working closely together for a while and I have to admit that I like the fuck. We’ve become friends, so he knows more of what’s going on with me and Paige than probably anyone else, well, except for maybe Ironfist.

  Ironfist knows a lot because Paige is always at their house and is friends with his woman, Rebecca. They got four kids though, so I’m not sure they sit around and talk about the relationship status of me and Paige, but what the fuck do I know. Maybe they do, do that. Who the fuck am I to know a damn thing?

  “You find anything out on Smoke and the senator, whoever the fuck is in charge of that damn LA Mafia?”

  “Got nothin’,” I grunt. “Prez was talking about going to the Four Corners Bike Rally next month. I thought I could maybe keep an ear to the ground, ask some questions. See if I hear anything at all. See if they knew anything about Smoke.”

  “Christ, who would have thought Smoke?” Bans asks on a chuckle.

  Shrugging a shoulder, I clear my throat and look over to him. “Fucking hell,” I mutter. “I know. I‌ still can’t believe it. It’s been so long now that I should be able to comprehend it, but I fucking cannot.”

  “No fucking shit,” Prez barks as he slides up beside me.

  We spend the rest of the evening drinking and talking. Prez splits to go to his woman. Bans slinks away with a clubwhore not long after. I could fuck someone tonight, but the only person that I want to fuck isn’t here, so I signal the bartender for another beer.

  There is a noise, then I hear a woman shout behind me. Turning my head, I see Moxie. She throws a beer bottle and shouts something unintelligible. Fuck. She’s been a mess since we had to kill her traitor of an old man, Smoke.

  Standing up, I walk over to her. She is still shouting, but I don’t see who she’s even yelling at. Sliding my arm around her shoulders, I pull her against my side. She doesn’t say anything. There’s nothing to say. Instead, she buries her face against my chest and she cries.

  This isn’t how I saw this night going at all but fuck it. Moxie was a good old lady. She didn’t deserve the shit that Smoke put her through. We didn’t deserve to have Smoke be a fucking betraying bastard either.

  The whole situation is fucked.

  CHAPTER TWO

  PAIGE

  The night goes off without a hitch, with zero to little fanfare. I help make dinner for the kids, using cooking skills that Rebecca has been teaching me. I’m not an amazing chef or anything, but whereas before I met her, I couldn’t even boil water, I can now make a few things.

  Blueberry muffins are my favorite, but since this isn’t breakfast time, I made some mac and cheese, broccoli, and baked chicken. All in all, success. Th
e kids are even bathed and now are snuggled in their beds after a bedtime story, of course, one that I was asked to read twice, so I did.

  When the story was over, the second time, they all dispersed to their rooms. I’m still getting used to their new place, even though I’ve been here what feels like a million times. It’s way bigger than where they were before. To me, it’s seriously fancy.

  I never had someone read a bedtime story to me, so if they ask me to read a hundred, I’m reading a hundred. Thankfully, they’ve never asked me to read a hundred bedtime stories, and I’m not going to give them the idea either. But I would do it if they asked. I would do pretty much anything if they asked.